Age is just a number, or so they say, but we also live in an extremely youth-fixated society that shames aging. Humans are terrified of aging, but the truth is that it is going to happen to all of us…if we are lucky. The alternative is not aging because we no longer have that particular option available. Once you look at it that way, a few wrinkles are not the end of the world.
But what happens when your dreams and desires run right into ageism? What do you do when you are told that you are too old to pursue your passions? Do you throw in the towel? Or do you pick up some hyaluronic acid moisturizer and go for it? Today’s column comes courtesy of a reader who has been told they are too old to model and is uncertain about what their next step should be. The Dirty Talk advice column has the answers they are seeking! (and some flattering lighting. Lighting is everything)
“I’m an amateur model who recently made the decision to try to transition into fetish modeling. Unfortunately, I have been told by a few photographers, as well as other models, that I’m too old to do fetish modeling, as well as too old to model in general. I’m in my mid-30s and didn’t think my age would be an issue! I’m feeling really defeated and depressed. Modeling has been so helpful in combating my body dysmorphia. Is it impossible to pursue fetish modeling if I’m over 30? Should I consider taking a shot at doing my own photography? Any advice is greatly appreciated.—Too Old To Model?”
There Are No Modeling Age Limits
I did not do my first shoot until I was 30, and if I had listened to people telling me that I was too old, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Of course, people told me that 30 was too old to start a modeling career! Naturally. But their opinions were not paying my rent and so I didn’t pay them any mind. Were there not as many opportunities for me as if I was 19? Sure. But that didn’t mean there were zero.
I was doing my best work as a fetish model for Kink.com and Insex when I was 33-38. Too old to fetish model my ASS. If I was too old for some viewers, they were free to look at other models, but it never stopped me from getting consistently booked. The heydays of Kink.com and Insex are long gone, but that is another topic and you don’t want to get me started on the topic of what piracy did to the industry or we will be here all night.
Do What Works For You
You say modeling has been really helpful in combating your body dysmorphia, and if that is the case, you should most definitely keep it up! When photographers or other models tell you that you are too old to model, that is just their personal opinion. Too old for them personally. Fine. Whatever. Moving on. They aren’t the only photographers in the world.
If modeling brings you joy, pursue that joy and do what makes you happy. That’s what I do, and I am better off for it. For every photographer that only wants to work with 18-year-olds, there is one that is ok with working with models in their 30s, 40s, 50s, etc. I personally plan on modeling forever because of how much I enjoy it.
There Is A Market For Everything!
There is a market for everything, and there is definitely a market for models over the age of 30. That market is actually quite big! No matter a person’s age, size, gender, ethnicity, or orientation, there is someone into it. Guaranteed. I can promise you that. It is a wide world out there, and there is something for everyone.
Increase Your Skills
You mention looking into doing your own photography and if there’s one thing I’d really like to encourage you to do, it would be that. The more skill sets you can acquire as a creative, the better off you are going to be. I am my own photographer, my own lighting tech, my own set designer, and my own editor. Not only has this made me a much better model, but it has been deeply satisfying to watch myself get better at doing something I love.
There isn’t a need for really expensive equipment in order to get started. I do all of my photography off of my cell phone and a tripod. I mostly work with natural lighting along with some cheap lighting equipment I got from Amazon. By building my own portfolio that showcases me at my best, other photographers can get an idea of what it is I can bring to the table. It is a win-win, really.
Don’t give up on your dreams. Only invest your time and energy in people that believe in them. Always strive to get better. You can be fetish modeling in your 60s and crushing it, I promise. I am going to be! Hope to see you there.
Keep it Kinky My Friends,
RDG
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